Part 2: How to Make Friends and Not Alienate People

(…while travelling solo..). The questions a lot of people ask me about travelling by myself are things like, “But don’t you ever get lonely?” and “How did you meet so many people?” I bet you’ve seen blogs and facebook pages full of people’s travel pictures, surrounded by about a hundred new friends they seem to have made in about 2 days. They make it look so dam easy. Hopefully after reading this, you’ll realise that yeah, it really can be that easy. Forming friendships and connecting with people is the reason I love to travel alone. It’s so much easier to make friends this way. For me, having one good conversation with a stranger can completely turn my day from bleurgh to amazing. You feel alive, exhilarated and it’s an instant confidence boost. 10 Tips on how to make friends while travelling:

Hostel night out

Hostel night out

1. Stay in a hostel dorm. You’ll instantly be surrounded by travellers in the exact same situation as you. Most people i’ve met in hostels were on their own. It’s pretty much guaranteed they will be friendly and interested in talking to you. As soon as you meet your room mates in your dorm, introduce yourself with a smile and a firm handshake, don’t leave it until later. The usual questions will follow, “Where do you come from?”, “Where have you been travelling so far?” etc. If  you like them, just go for it and ask if they want to hang out that evening or next day. Remember there’s nothing to lose in being totally forward. Be confident. If they say they have other plans, who cares, there’s a whole hostel full of people to meet. A lot of hostels have organised day and night trips. Definitely check them out as you’re likely to have a great time and make a bunch of friends. Most people I end up hanging out with are from my dorm room. Hostellers are mostly always wonderfully friendly and you’ll never get lonely staying in one that’s for sure. 2. Join a group activity. Again, guaranteed you will meet people and potentially make great friends. For example, join a sport activity (surf lesson, kayaking, white-water rafting, windsurfing, diving..) These people are usually outgoing and fun given how they’ve chosen to spend their day. Join a cooking class, yoga class, sightseeing tour..
Balinese cooking class

Balinese cooking class

3. Smile. Lots. Most people are instantly drawn to someone who looks happy and smily. No one wants to strike a conversation with grumpypants. For sure you’ll encounter people throughout your trip – your waiter, taxi driver, sales assistant..just by simply smiling and giving a warm, open impression, they will likely start a conversation with you. 4. Be brave and confident. Travelling on your own isn’t easy, and lots of people I know wouldn’t do it. So if you’re on your own remind yourself that it is pretty freaking awesome what you’re doing. Actually while reading the last Cosmo magazine featuring Jessica Alba, I really liked a quote from her: “My theory is that if you look confident you can pull off anything – even if you have no clue what you’re doing.” SO true. 5. Go out to a bar. This may sound super daunting if you’re by yourself and quite shy, but it’s so exhilerating. Make sure it’s a busy one, and sit at the actual bar. It’s easier to talk to the person next to you, and if all else fails there is always the bartender to chat to! And of course alcohol sure helps the situation. Look up at the people around you and be sure of yourself. Go for it and strike a conversation with the person next to you, or in the queue. Ask if they live in the area.. any tips of things to do and see. I assure you they will immediately be impressed that you are by yourself. My last trip in Bali I was sat alone at a funky bar. It was completely packed, and although it was pretty intimidating at first, I ended up having such a fun night with this american woman who introduced me to her table of friends. We only started talking because we were both chatting up the same guy at the same time ha. (The 3 cocktails I guzzled down probably helped!). Full moon 6. Couchsurfers.com This website is brilliant for travellers. It’s not just for sleeping on people’s couches. It is an instant access to so many people wanting to meet travellers just like you – they are in your exact situation. I used this website to join the ‘group’ of the town I was in and simply joined in on the discussion forum by posting my number and asking if anyone wanted to hang out, arrange a trip, meet up for lunch/dinner. I got several texts in the next few days and ended up going bowling and singing karaoke with these refreshingly friendly, fun group of people who had all met through couchsurfers also. I absolutely loved it! 7. Approach people, strike conversations. This can be anywhere, at the supermarket, at the park, museums, on modes of transport. It takes guts, but most people will be happy you want to talk to them and admire your confidence. Worst case scenario is that they’re not very friendly, and meh, you’ll never see them again anyway. 8. Be smart.  Be aware of the decisions you make as a solo traveller, who you choose to spend time with and the places that you go with them. Especially when meeting people from the internet. Obviously only arrange to meet them in outdoor public areas. Preferably during the day first. 9. Make your own adventure. Don’t ever let the fact that you’re by yourself stop you from discovering, exploring and creating your own fun. 10. Remember: If you’re on your own you’ve already made yourself significantly more approachable. Relax, be yourself, take each day as it comes and you’ll have a ton of great stories to tell by the end of your trip :). Related articles

About Veronica

World traveler + foodie. Sharing travel stories, tips & advice as I seek adventure around the globe.